The healthy patient — and the linear-scale illusion
This is what good looks like: both curves dive, then grind, then flatten, with validation (green) riding slightly above train (white) — a small, stable gap. Now the trap: click the scale toggle. On a linear axis this healthy run looks finished by step 80 — you'd stop it, wasting the second half where the loss drops another 5×. Log scale is not a preference; it's the instrument.
Each "patient" is a fresh real training run (polynomial regression, gradient descent) — the shapes vary but the anatomy doesn't.
Ward round — the six classic diseases
Six beds, six patients, six signatures. Click any thumbnail to enlarge it with the tell-tale annotated. The two on the right of the top row are the famous look-alikes — underfit and cold-lr both crawl, and telling them apart is the differential every junior gets wrong (the tell: cold-lr is still improving steadily at the end; underfit has truly flattened).
All six are generated by actually inducing the pathology in a toy run: the overfit patient really has too much capacity, the hot-lr patient really oscillates, the leak patient really shares data between splits.
The diagnosis game — new patient every round
Board exam time. Each round generates a fresh, unlabeled patient with random severity — same generator as the ward, new random parameters, so you can't memorize pixels, only signatures. Six buttons, one correct answer, streak counter. Get five in a row and you're cleared for real dashboards.
Severity, noise and duration are randomized each round — some cases are subtle on purpose. Your score only counts the first click per patient.
The leak — when "too good" is the disease
The only disease that looks like a promotion. Drag the slider to let a fraction of validation examples secretly appear in the training set — the standard accident (duplicate rows, near-duplicates, test answers in the pretraining crawl). Watch validation sink below train. Every instinct says celebrate; the X-ray says the eval is broken.
The leak is mechanical, not cosmetic: that fraction of the val set literally is training data, so the model has memorized those answers. The gap you see is measured on the contaminated split.
Spike autopsy — recover, or roll back?
Real pretraining logs aren't smooth — they have incidents. Below is a long run with its gradient-norm co-signal (the second vital sign). Inject incidents yourself: a spike (one bad batch / momentary instability) usually self-heals in a few dozen steps; a slow divergence never does. The autopsy rule: judge the 50 steps after the anomaly, not the anomaly itself.
Top: loss (log). Bottom: gradient norm. The injected spike is a transient lr kick; the divergence is a genuine slow blow-up of the toy weights — both play out through the real dynamics.